My favourite driving techniques

I just love these driving behaviours in others:

1. thinking the right hand lane has their name on it (in Australia we drive on the left side of the road) even though they are not even approaching the speed limit


2. the belief that everyone should drive 20kph over the speed limit


3. inability to find the accelerator until the instance someone tries to overtake, at which point accelerating up to the speed of light until the errant party gives up their futile attempt, after which normal sub-speed limit speed can be resumed


4. the belief that they are the only one on the road despite doing 40kph under the speed limit on a single lane road with an armada of cars behind


5. the dodgem car accelerator - sitting on the same speed regardless of speed limit - usually well under highway limit but way over suburban street limit


6. the early merger - you are not doing us any favours by merging early in those long merging lanes people - this just means people behind you end up merging in front of you eventually resulting in a log jam


7. the non-merger - how dare we try and enter your highway


8. I call certain traffic light start behaviour the ion driver after hypothetical ion drives that will continue to approach light speed but with extremely slow acceleration, taking millions of years to get to that point


9. the person who seems to think that sitting 1cm off your tail will make the ten cars in front of you go faster - or course that can be forgiven since obviously they are the only one in a hurry


10. those "baby on board" people who think it is your responsibility to drive safely not theirs

Now I risk being branded sexist but amongst my circle of friends I notice this behavioural difference between men and women. The guys I know generally like to accelerate fast but will coast to a gentle stop, being branded as hoons by their womenfolk for their green light antics. However, the chicks accelerate mildly at the green light then stop at every red light as if a dog has just run out in front of them, brake pedal flat to the floor with no room for contingency. This is, of course, much more safe and sensible behaviour.

September 11

Well its been five years apparently since that event - I am sure you know to what I am referring. Funny how it seems to get less public attention as time goes on. It's almost like we need something like that every so often to remind us that we are not living in happy fairy land where everyone will get along if we just start being nice to those less fortunate countries. But as long as you don't ask people to be nice to the person sitting next to them I dont see why that couldn't work. Of course, those other countries would first have to accept 9/11 as September 11th and not 9th of November! God bless America!

Steve Irwin died

...as the whole world knows by now. They are talking about state funerals and the like now. Perhaps they will bury him in a island in the middle of the crocodile swamp at Australia Zoo so that people can make a pilgrimage to his grave - if they are brave enough.

I mean c'mon, yeah he was a likable chap with apparently good intentions but lets face it the guy always was a walking meat popsicle. Although the manner of his death was a bit freakish, it is not really a surprise that he was killed by wildlife.

I guess people thought he would end up as one of those people you vaguely remember on a "where are they now?" show like that Richard Attensomething guy.

While I am sure that most (myself included) feel sympathy towards his family, I am also sure that many will not hesitate to support the invasive probing of the press by buying their gutter scraping tripe. And so the stings continue...

Hello World!

I am just doing some research into blogs and thought it might actually be a good idea to set one up.

In the unlikely event that anyone cares, the name Mr Beneuto is a nickname given to me by a colleague that sorta stuck. I decided to pick the them "minima black" for my theme because a) I liked the look of it, b) I am a minimalist and c) my favourite colour is black (back off geeks - black is a colour as far as I am concerned ;-)

Well lets see if anything actually becomes of this.